like 007 with a spatula and neurosis

I went shooting with Dad

it was not awful



i did not do awful

accept for that little guy



but I wouldnt worry about that little guy

not jet puff

my nut has been fluffed

or my fluff has been nutted

either way I think I win

metropolitan male

I am actually just yawning

my haircut was abused by great clips

my shirt is only neon because I read somewhere the 80's were coming back, but did not believe it until I saw this gear in Barcelona

im metropolitan

eat it

oily and dirty

dishwasher and microwavable safe!

German Folker

We had a very pleasant German musician by the name of Thomas Wissing stay with us this week. Last night he performed at Abbey Pub, he is darn good and does an uncanny impression of Johnny Cash.

brian is home

new secret message pockets

Last night I had a brain surge while buzzing through my latest set of daily blog checks, which was completely unrelated to the development of the secret-message-pockets (available soon at your local Paper Produce Factory, but nonetheless inspired me to get my hands working on something more:



here are some people for us Chicago folk you should all check out Incubate-Chicago.com (artist in residency program), John Campbell (comic/cartoonist recent transplant), Midwest Radical Culture Corridor (I could not even begin to explain all that this movement encompasses, but do not miss the boat - in town this weekend -).

Today I am a happy koala

Preparation for Dinner

Chicken Yassa

Mini Hulk vs. The Thing

as refereed by some weird McDonald's character of yor

zombie love

Vagrant Aesthetic grew into a beautiful Joined at the Stitch



and then sent me this awesome bookmark as part of a trade

what should I send?

happier paper produce

potatoes are creepier when they smile

and they still carry a special message

drag race

a show put on every Tuesday outside the bar of Roscoes in which several drag queens race each other down the street for Mac products



there is also a potato sack race

sometimes wonderful things happen

Old People Dying

Lots of elderly folk live in our building

sometimes they die and leave things behind

sometimes those things get thrown in the trash

and sometimes

just sometimes

they come back



so now I can make it into something new

We Needed Grocery's Today

Caputo's has great produce sales


featured in the photo (starting right to left): 3 Apples, 1 Cantaloupe, 2 Garlic, 1 bag Basmati Brown Rice, 2 Plantains, 1 bottle Cabernet, 5 Peaches, 1 box Capellini, 1 package Linguine, 1 Coconut, 1 Ginger Root

GQ can make you more European

or so says their summer cocktail suggestions


you can do it

put your back into it

watch out the pachyderms spray

this is the face my brother makes when we all go to Brookfield Zoo on a nice day

Rub-a-dub

Shower time on a Friday
dont forget your loofah

You Dont Own Me

Mustache - makes you cooler, saves water, deters bad hygiene



booya

Because I watched "How to draw a bunny"

I like to write about things here now cause they are not often seen. They are unnoticed schemes that all ultimately fail. This is great. Today I am starting a library for artists. There is a library somewhere in NY where you can send anything to and they would keep it. I do not know if it even exists anymore, but I thought I would like to have a library also. Then maybe one day I can open a place to store it all. I would be a good librarian and make recommendations and have special selections. I could do research or not. I would keep the works in good condition and maintain integrity at the highest level of librarian levels.

I liked to use things like Craigslist to access people. Artists are out there. They will participate. If you want to participate you can to. Just send me your art in the mail. Real art or take a photo or send a fragment of it or maybe just your name on an empty envelope so someone out there knows you create art. Do whatever you want for security, put no return address, make one up, or find out who I am.



It kind of sucks to document yourself. Buy things, create a cult following, someone make stories about me, us, and canned culture.

We are winning, yes.

For Blogs Sake!

Sitting down to blog has become a grueling task. Melissa shared with me some info the other day that made me shake up my thinking. She has decided to reject the net obsession. Between her and the latest South Park episode I think it has become fairly clear how nasty addicted most of us are to the web.

Therefore, she told me, if she finds herself bumbling around for more then five minutes with out any specific direction she shuts down and makes something with her hands. This seems like a pretty simple solution, too simple. However, I think it is a great idea. Unplug and write a friend a letter, make a mix CD and mail it off or randomly drop it off in the produce section of your local grocery store, or draw pictures of food, color them, and sell them for $0.25 online.

Like this:
I want to talk to you all out there more and with my departure for the west coast creeping ever closer I am reaching out to some of my neglected projects to get some motivation.

Buy my paper produce!

Joe's Paper Produce Shack

Now on TV! Canned Culture: Season Two

Friends,

No better way for us to kick off our season

It has been too long coming, but we hope well worth the wait. Canned Culture has been hard at work partnering up with the Emmy Award Winning: Current TV.

You have heard mention of Current TV before with our We Create Doc. We Create Again continues to climb the charts and has been bouncing in the top five for the past week or so. This is indeed exciting news as our plans to embark on a larger We Create themed event begin to take shape.


However, the great secret we have been waiting to unveil is finally ready:

Current TV has purchased our latest project: Doll Life.

About two months ago Current TV called us up asking if we would be interested in doing a story on Chicago artists Amber Hawk Swanson and her partner, a life-size real doll made in her own likeness.

With the help of camera men Exal Iraheta (We Create Again) and Ian Sklarsky (both shot and edited Doll Life) we filmed the wedding reception of Amber Hawk Swanson & Amber Doll at their lovely home in Chicago's Bucktown neighborhood.

A couple of follow up interviews later, plenty of hours of editing, and a wealth of fascinating dialogue on Swanson's artistic intentions and Current TV was ready to purchase a finished product.

We are in prep mode with some wonderful and very helpful folk over at Current TV to get this on air as soon as possible to run concurrently with the opening date of similarly themed: Lars And the Real Girl.


We invite everyone to check out the video seen here on Current TV's website and keep your eyes peeled on Current TV for our mini doc: Doll Life





Also, if you live in the Chicago-land area then you are surely aware that the Chicago International Film Festival is currently going on. Below is a list of time and dates for the Lars and the Real Girl premiers with Amber Hawk Swanson attending and an anticipated appearance by Amber Doll.

To Purchase Tickets:

AMC River East 21, 322 E. Illinois
Thursday, 11 October 09:00 PM
Add this screening to my list.

Landmark's Century Centre Cinema, 2828 N. Clark
Saturday, 13 October 05:45 PM
Add this screening to my list.


This is just a first of many great things coming from Canned Culture this season, stay tuned, and let us know what you think.

Now on TV! Canned Culture: Season Two

Friends,

No better way for us to kick off our season

It has been too long coming, but we hope well worth the wait. Canned Culture has been hard at work partnering up with the Emmy Award Winning: Current TV.

You have heard mention of Current TV before with our We Create Doc. We Create Again continues to climb the charts and has been bouncing in the top five for the past week or so. This is indeed exciting news as our plans to embark on a larger We Create themed event begin to take shape.


However, the great secret we have been waiting to unveil is finally ready:

Current TV has purchased our latest project: Doll Life.

About two months ago Current TV called us up asking if we would be interested in doing a story on Chicago artists Amber Hawk Swanson and her partner, a life-size real doll made in her own likeness.

With the help of camera men Exal Iraheta (We Create Again) and Ian Sklarsky (both shot and edited Doll Life) we filmed the wedding reception of Amber Hawk Swanson & Amber Doll at their lovely home in Chicago's Bucktown neighborhood.

A couple of follow up interviews later, plenty of hours of editing, and a wealth of fascinating dialogue on Swanson's artistic intentions and Current TV was ready to purchase a finished product.

We are in prep mode with some wonderful and very helpful folk over at Current TV to get this on air as soon as possible to run concurrently with the opening date of similarly themed: Lars And the Real Girl.


We invite everyone to check out the video seen here on Current TV's website and keep your eyes peeled on Current TV for our mini doc: Doll Life





Also, if you live in the Chicago-land area then you are surely aware that the Chicago International Film Festival is currently going on. Below is a list of time and dates for the Lars and the Real Girl premiers with Amber Hawk Swanson attending and an anticipated appearance by Amber Doll.

To Purchase Tickets:

AMC River East 21, 322 E. Illinois
Thursday, 11 October 09:00 PM
Add this screening to my list.

Landmark's Century Centre Cinema, 2828 N. Clark
Saturday, 13 October 05:45 PM
Add this screening to my list.


This is just a first of many great things coming from Canned Culture this season, stay tuned, and let us know what you think.

Canned Culture: Tips A Couple Thousand Hats to VBS TV

I had a great deal to talk about in this blog. However, one item has taken a large presendence and I feel I may have missed the boat on this one, so lets swim like hell and catch up because we sure do not want to be left behind. First eat up this sampling of the Sudanese Situation as covered by VBS TV Vice Co-Founder, Shane Smith:



VBS TV

I have often spoken about Current TV, its incredible diversity of stories and its mind boggling Vanguard Journalism that still vastly outweighs the type of news service the mass media counterparts do.

Now there is something new. I was recently trying to gain insight on pop culture in Africa. I thought it would be a thrilling study of cultural goings on that hit the map for the continent. This did not work very well. I decided to narrow my search to a country, this also wielded little success.

Ultimately, I found myself investigating American Pop Culture, specifically how we define it and how it rises to rank. Upon doing so I was told by former roommate Toby, of the famed Joby's Place Ukrainian Village, Chicago, to check out a blog called Pop Candy. It appeared this blog hit all things major indie (so defined as independent everything) pop culture. Definitely worth a once a day look-see.

Leading to the final connection, VBS TV. It could be that the fact that they were discussing a segment called "Spike Jonez spends a Saturday With" or because this episode was with blow my mind (previously mentioned) Sri Lankan hip-hop, indie, rap, beauty M.I.A., but I have spent that last several hours rampaging the site, devouring as much footage as possible.

Why? Who are they? What do they do? Why not read for yourself, even for a generation with minimal attention spans, if you can get this wee bit absorbed you'll realize how vital its worth is. Say no more:

VBS is an online broadcast network. We stream original content, free of charge and 24 hours a day. We carry a mix of domestic and international news, pop and underground culture coverage, and the best music in the world. People have used words like eclectic, smart, funny, shocking, and revolutionary to describe VBS, but we kind of just snapped our fingers in their faces and went, “Whatever. Tell us something we don’t know.”

With Academy Award-nominated director Spike Jonze (Adaptation, Being John Malkovich) as our creative director, original content from a veritable United Nations of contributors, and bureaus in 20 countries, VBS has hit the planet in a manner not unlike a massive global plague. Streaming on VBS’s signature “in-room” widescreen and remote, content will be available all the time, on-demand.

Basically, VBS will exploit every utopian vision the internet has thus far failed to live up to. Thanks for watching.

With tag lines like: "Saving your eyes from the blinding pain of television" and "Rescuing you from television's death like grip" how could I say no.

So the blog with all the R. Kelly Trapped In the Closet and the Amber Hawk Swanson tale of an artist marrying a sex doll made to look identical to her, and the Dolly Party, Burt Reynolds Best Little Whorehouse in Texas Pancakes, etc. will have to wait a little bit longer. Not that it is not worth it.

But the message should ring loud and clear, subscribe immediately to VBS TV. I challenge all of you to visit and NOT find one thing there that interests you.

And if you do find something great, share it here in our comments or email us at cannedculture@gmail.com.

Sunrise Party

This weekend we started a new annual tradition of the Sunrise Party. Starting at midnight on Friday we put out a buffet of fruits, nuts and vegetables and wine, vodka, rum, and... well way too much of everything.

Needless to say if there are any local folk who want some bananas, kiwis, strawberries or mangoes before they go bad, contact me immediately!

In other news we have had an influx of new items to play with and I thought we'd take a few minutes to appreciate some of these delicacies from our friends.

New Friends

First, joining Harvey the Roomba (made a cameo in our Christmas special last year) is our amigarumi pal Melissa dropped off the other day, his name is Mochi. This photo depicts him still hiding in Melissa's cupboard.

We also had a surprise move-in that my guy brought home to help us with office work. He was a bit pale in the beginning and not very friendly either, but after a brief makeover (Stage 1) by multimedia collage artist Priscilla Ramos he has made a complete turn around.

Introducing Jose!

Viva Pedro

If you have not heard of Pedro Almodovar then your are missing out on a staple of Spanish cinema. Having seen All About My Mother a couple of years ago it was not difficult to except the recommendation for Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown. The film alone could not be found on my Blockbuster mail order and the only one available online was $5 cheaper then the entire collection.

More on that after screening.

'Marklund Home' Shopping Spree


The perfect costume, glam tech, cabaret, Halloween, etc. attire.

including:

1 lavender & pink ruffled tuxedo button down
1 plaid lime green jacket
1 blue sequins cumberbun
1 faux spotted Cruella DeVille-style rabbit fur coat
1 bowling hat
1 ladies throw coat w/ dangling sparkled gems
1 beaded necklace & 2 cute scarves (not pictured) as gifts to friends for make-up work before parties

Ali Spagnola

Ali Spagnola, a future guest on the show, is running a Free Paintings Campaign on her website. You can request anything you like and she will paint it, package it, and send it all free of charge. A couple of weeks ago this great guy arrived featuring a cartoony Brian & I.

Ian Ophelan


Ian does all kinds of great illustrations and if you send him a photo he may very well do one of you. Check out his site to see more work and send in a picture.

That is all for this installment. Plenty more on its way.

hey!

look over there!

melissa ♥ blogs. melissa ♥ amigurumi.

it only made sense.

xoxo

Canned Culture: Where Do You Get Your Material?

I am glad you asked. We derive our materials from whatever seems to skim the top of our most treasured creative standards. We spend hours each week sifting through internet rubble to find the last slivers of gold. We always go with muts and runts of the litter because they have better character. That and we have great friends who work and have interest in different fields which helps us stay tuned in to the latest. Like these important gems.

we dont typically condone more then 30 minutes of youtubing in one sitting, that is why this is a mere 10. perfect for your lunchtime, typing time, emailing time, staring blankly into space time, off during work.

ala cartoonbrew.com :



and sometimes we get to reclaim people like Alanis Morisette. Listen Alanis, we like the funny things you do when you play God in Dogma and you totally rule over as queen Canadian of 90's old alternative music, but when you tried to appease us and bide your time with a "best of" acoustic album. We figured you either had run out of creative juice or were just getting lazy.

Then you did this and have been fully redeemed (thanks, it was hard to let you go):



Hearing the pitter patter of the Geek Chic revolution is fully noted by the music intentions of Data Rock, we can thank Mary over at - going in for the kiss kiss - :



if your still with us after all that other stuff then you lucked out because this is the after hour special, straight from the experimental animation sources itself Director Andy Huang. I first saw his animation Doll Face, absolutely worth the 3 minutes. Enjoy this short: The Gloaming.

Videos by Andrew Huang | More VMIX videos
View more videos | Embed this video

Canned Culture Eats The Big Apple

While on my journey to NYC to unearth the best new work to share with are superb clientel I stumbled across some people worth bringing up. For examples:

Julie Brown

No, no, no. Not Dowtown Julie Brown as everyone including my father suspected. This is the classic gay icon that showered us with her MTV Impersonations of Madonna and the most audacious B Films like my personal favorite, Earth Girls Are Easy.

But in case you needed a refreshment: Cause Im A Blonde


Disorient

Spent another long night down in Brooklyn dancing with the people of a style known to us now as Glam Tech. I rocked it out in my lime-green plaid coat and my new shirt apprehended from the reigns of Substance 80.



Miss. Tallulah of the Bayous


Who would have thought that Sunday night playing Bingo could be such a riot. Here with these kids it turned out to be quite the night of entertainment. Followed by the delicacy of delicious French African foods @ Les Enfants Terribles.

However, it is to be noted that champagne, vodka tonic, wine, and more champagne always make a flight much shorter.

Do not fret yet there is plenty more to be discussed including Dolly Parton, Alanis Morisette, Data Rock, Sesame Street Rock-Out-a-Thon........and.......

a release list for our shows airing this fall.

Canned Culture Coming Out Event

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

On The Horizon

Between sleepless nights and droning days of work I have been wrestling with seedlings of new projects and ideas. Sifting through them to see if the residuals were worth cultivating I have come across various ideas, events, and people. Perhaps one of you might have a suggestion at how to link them.

So lets get back to basics. While I find the raunchiest stripper joint in Chicago for Melissa's bachelorette party you all enjoy this and we will be back before you know it.

The current ABC's are:

- Amy Winehouse Concert - September 29th, Aragon Ballroom Chicago, IL

Can I say that I'm shockingly thrilled about this? While Amy has exploded in Europe as the new gay icon, she is slowly creeping her way forward in the states. Even though Joss Stone rose quickly behind Winehouse on the charts, I believe she will endure much longer. Plus the Brit, cynical, Courtney-Love-during-Hole look is gotten a big thumbs up from me.

The British tabloids certainly loved her, as is seen:

"An article about manic depression quotes Winehouse as stating that she is a clinically diagnosed manic depressive who refuses to take medication." - The Independent

"Winehouse admitted to have previously been affected by eating disorders. "A little bit of anorexia, a little bit of bulimia. I'm not totally OK now but I don't think any woman is." - The Independent

"Winehouse made multiple appearances in the British tabloids over alleged alcohol-induced behaviour including heckling U2 frontman Bono." -The Charlotte Church Show

"I have a really good time some nights, but then I push it over the edge and ruin my boyfriend's night. I’m an ugly dickhead drunk, I really am." - The Times

"They’re tryin to make me go to rehab, I said no, no, no."

- Casting Calls -

For those looking to find fame, fortune and Showtime network television show appearances in their summer plans, this is your month. Without the best of details, word has trickled down the grapevine that the hit series (and personal pet show) Weeds, starring the amazingly versatile and always amusing Mary-Louise Parker as Nancy Botwin, is doing open casting calls in all major cities to acquire some new faces as guest starts on the 3rd season.

"I'm not a dealer, I'm a mother who happens to distribute illegal products through a sham bakery set up by my ethically questionable CPA and his crooked lawyer friend." - Nancy Botwin, Weeds, Season One

Keep your ears and eyes peeled...Details to follow...


- ChaCha.com -

Introduced by a friend to this delightfully user friendly beta search engine, I was instantly addicted. Plus it's free!
Instructions:
1. Type Search Term
2. Get too many unrelated results
3. Activate a one click button giving you access to a 24/7 guide who you can chat with over real time to screen the search items for specifically what your searching for. Kind of like having your own personal assistant for research.

I recommend giving it a shot while it is still fresh, new, and doesn't require payment.

- Couchsurfing -

The best way to travel. Sleeping With Locals as Nick Vivion puts it, check out what it is like to stay for free using the tens of thousands of participants on CouchSurfing.com all over the world.

On my brief skip through Europe I purchased some higher end H&M fashion from a place with hip top fashion called Top Man. While this is a subsidiary of Kate Moss' Top Shop. It is definitely worth the overseas shipping costs for a $40 (£80) suit jacket or a swanky button down at $6 (£12). They seem to be primarily dominated by a regurgitated 80's fashion trend (which I have subsequently begun to fund minor appreciations for). Additionally, all students internationally receive a 10% discount. Their sales always wield some interesting nab that everyone will be asking about, so why not show a little Euro flare.

A much better alternative for those wanting to stay with national independent clothing designers is KarmaLoop.com. Everything from higher end folk such as Paul Frank, Penguin, and Triple Five, to much less known, but superb The Imaginary Foundation, Fuct, and Garbege. The samples below can speak for themselves. Worth the dollar to sport some gear that no one in your 50 mile radius would ever bump into, guaranteed.




That should be all for now, but Im certainly sitting on many more things to tell you all about. I am near busting, but Melissa says to hold off until the next show. So while I fly to NYC to gather some additionally yummy footage you all hold tight.

A bit of feedback wouldn't hurt either. How is the ABC search filling in? Should I keep logging this to you folk? Blimey, I think its time to hit the hay. Give us love.

Also, the We Create Again video's Current TV stats are as follows:

Out of 20,000 docs we are ranked.... 15, with near 600 points, 91 votes and near 1000 views. This is good news for us, slow and steady, aye! Thanks for all the support friends.

HEY!

We're still alive.

I'm planning my wedding, so bear with us here, kids. Joe V has been working his butt off getting organized and planning new content and exciting new shows, deciding the fate of Canned Culture and how we can best showcase that which we love so much. Me? I've been trying to find the best shoes to go with my wedding dress. What? Don't look at me like that. I've been thinking about art too. But mostly about shoes. And flowers. And what song I'm supposed to dance to....

In the meantime, here's a fun picture of my new frog. His name is Bosaki. Love Bosaki. Bosaki will hold you over until we return. ♥